Archive for June, 2009
Ian’s 8th Birthday Celebration (Ian, Announcements)
Posted by Tom in Uncategorized on June 24th, 2009
We’re thinking ahead to Ian’s birthday (7/19) and have decided to have a “party” and take a group to Feed My Starving Children.
Ian went with us twice to work at Feed My Starving Children. The most recent time was during his radiation treatments last summer…he was so tired…yet courageous and kind. He said, “Mom, Jesus likes what we’re doing here!”
Oh how much you taught us, Buddy Bear!
Somehow we feel the need to do what CAN be done to help other parents who are feeling helpless while watching their children suffer. According to one web source, close to 30,000 children starve to death every day. It’s appalling when something can be done to help save those children.
The facility isn’t open on Sundays, so we have applied for a time slot on the 18th, which is a Saturday night. We’ll post again once we have a date confirmed; in the meantime, if you are interested in joining us at Feed My Starving Children in Eagan, MN, please post and let us know. Include your e-mail address and we’ll keep you informed with further details as they unfold.
If you aren’t able to join us, but would like to contribute to this worthy cause, here is more information:
Our goal is to raise enough money to feed 25 children for a year (cost: $1530.00).
To contribute to that goal, please send checks to:
IAN HENDERSON MEMORIAL FUND:
Klein Bank
3000 Cty. Rd. #42 West—Suite#100
Burnsville, MN 55337
Mark your check – “FMSC” or “Happy Birthday Ian” and we’ll send all those contributions to Feed My Starving Children.
If you would like to receive a tax deduction and get on their mailing list, send your check to:
Feed My Starving Children
6750 West Broadway
Brooklyn Park, MN 55428
We would be honored if you mark your check “In memory of Ian Henderson”.
With heartfelt thanks –
Deb & Tom
Father’s Day (Stinking Firsts)
Posted by Tom in Uncategorized on June 20th, 2009
I’ve been meaning to write on the subject of the next year or so, ever since Mother’s Day. Deb and I are in for a year of very difficult anniversaries and “firsts”. We survived the first Easter without Ian by keeping our focus on Ian’s resurrection. We made it through the first Mother’s Day by going to Iowa and focusing on our own mothers (and grandmother). The anniversary of his diagnosis flew by as we left on our trip to Michigan. I’ve been meaning to use these occasions to start a new post category: “Stinking Firsts”. When he encountered something unpleasant (such as a 7-10 split in Wii Bowling), Ian would assign it the worst adjective he could think of–”stinking”. Granted, it’s not the worst thing I can think of, but it seems like a polite compromise.
Now I’m facing the next “stinking first”–my first post-Ian Father’s Day.
It doesn’t help that retailers are desperately trying to get people to buy things, so the advertising industry has been reminding me on an hourly basis that tomorrow there is nobody who looks to me as a paternal figure. Additionally, neither Deb nor I have any living male ancestors, so there is nobody on which to focus the day. In my weaker moments, I’m considering not attending church tomorrow. However, I found out that tomorrow is communion Sunday, and I hate to miss that. I’ll probably decide in the morning, around 9:55.
One thing that struck me today, and I hope I can figure out a way to convey it without sounding arrogant. I loved being a father, and it’s something that I truly enjoyed and invested myself in.* Perhaps instead of wondering why Ian had to be the child to have a brain tumor, I should wonder why I was the father of such a child. Perhaps God picked me because he knew that I could handle the assignment. I need to flesh that thought out more, and I might write about it.
Thank you to everyone who is taking the time to leave encouraging comments. They are appreciated, and help more than I can ever say.
*How many sentences can I end in a preposition in one post? Yikes...
Apologies, and Thanks (Announcements)
Posted by Tom in Uncategorized on June 20th, 2009
Confession time: I’ve been feeling a little sorry for myself that I haven’t gotten any comments on my last two posts. Two weeks had gone by since I made all the changes, and it seems like nobody has been visiting. I was expecting to receive email alerts whenever a comment was sent, informing me that I needed to approve/disapprove it.
I bothered to check the administrative page today, and found multiple ones waiting for me. Thank you all for bothering to stop by and read this drivel. And thank you even more for your prayers and thoughts back.
t
PS Actually, Paul, I did not have the guts to repel “Aussie style” that day. However, given the chance now, I would love to. For those wondering, this is Aussie style:
I don’t suppose anyone out there is into that sort of thing?
To Do: 1. Breathe… (Taking Stock, Tom)
Posted by Tom in Uncategorized on June 13th, 2009
Hendersonhome.net moved to new host? Check.
Deb’s blog set up? Check.
New blog software installed for Tom? Check.
New welcome page uploaded? Check.
Great! New writing commences in 3…2…1…
*Crickets chirping in the background*
The creative streak I was enjoying just hasn’t been coming lately. And it’s not that I want to write, as much as I want to want to write The drive that was in me months before has quietly excused itself, and I’ve really been noticing it lately, like when you realize that a friend has left a party early without saying goodbye.
Why?
Two possibilities come to mind, and I believe that they are related:
The suffering has changed. I’m not saying that things are fantastic, mind you. There are still days where the major accomplishments are that I’m breathing and vertical. I miss my son more than I miss my marbles, and each morning is a stark reminder that he’s not with me.
It’s that the suffering has changed. The adrenaline isn’t pumping, the searching for God’s will and mercy has ceased. We’ve gone from a battle to what feels like a desert wandering.
My input has changed. I’ll be honest: I’m spending my free time differently than I used to. My craving for entertainment tends to get the better of me lately. I used to look forward to spending time in scripture, but lately it’s more effort than enjoyment. My prayer time has suffered as well.
I believe that the two are tied together. When Ian was in the midst of his suffering (and, as his parent, I was suffering as well), I was much more dependent on my Lord. I sought Him out, and cherished my time with Him as a source of comfort and healing. Now, it feels more like a passive-aggressive relationship, at least on my part. Are there unresolved anger issues? Quite possibly. However, what hasn’t changed..
God is good. I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. (Ps. 27:13) His goodness is not my goodness (thank Goodness).
God’s grace will not fail. In my humanness, I keep wanting to measure and box God’s grace so that I have an understanding of it. Every so often I find myself asking my Lord, “I’ve ignored you for so long…do you mean to tell me that you still long for me?” The answer is a resounding “yes!”. He understands me better than I can imagine. He knows my condition, both as a human as well as a person who is in grief, and is patient with me.
He is not finished with me. This is where my emotions tend to betray me, and the enemy seeks to rob my joy. Too often lately both Deb and I fight the feeling that we have been put on a shelf, and there isn’t anything else for us to do; life will be endured, nothing more. I am still breathing, therefore my time here is not yet complete.
To this end, I’m currently working through Focus of a Warrior. It’s my desire to have a defined direction in life, and got has supplied FOAW as the means.
At any rate, now that the new blog software is in place, and as the healing continues, I want to write more. It’s not a hopeless cause, though. I’m in the middle of The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning; the main thrust seems to be “God has more grace for me than I can imagine, and it has nothing to do with me…Thank God.” Also, Deb and I are going to go see Rob Bell’s presentation Drops Like Stars in August.
Between the two of those, there’s got to be a post somewhere…
…aaaaaand, we’re back. (Announcements)
Posted by Tom Henderson in Uncategorized on June 4th, 2009
I’m still sorting through all the changes, but I think for the most part, the move was successful. If you see anything strange (and, by that I mean “out of the ordinary” for us) please let me know.
Mackinac Island trip pictures coming soon…
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