A Slow, One-Way Trip (Graces and Mercies, Pictures)

Deb and I were looking for a blank video tape last night, and happened to find one with some home movie footage from 2005. We watched Ian, then 3 1/2, looking for Easter eggs and playing in the rain. It has occurred to me before, but was driven home last night, that if I knew then what I know now, I would be heartbroken.

Our temporal-ness is a mercy. I was suddenly glad that I had almost seven years of getting to be with my son before we found out that he had a DIPG. If we lived our lives with full knowledge of what was to come...every blessing, every heartbreak...then I don't think we would be able to truly live in the "now."